Stillborn stories

This week has not been one of the most stellar weeks.  First off I lost about 10 chapters worth of crits and edits for my alpha reader.  I don’t know how; whether it was idiocy on my part or some other event (but let’s be honest, the probabilities are leaning towards me doing something dumb).  Either way it was a big chunk of work, and I’m so mad it’s not funny.

Then a short story turned to rubbish under my pen, at around the 10k word mark.  I’ve tried to rescue it, but I just can’t recapture the thread.  I think it’s a lost cause.  What hurts is that it’s 14 days of lost cause, and the way my time is at the moment, I resent those 14 days.  They feel wasted.  I know they aren’t, that it’s all practice and learning, but they hurt nonetheless.

So I put down the short, and started plotting out the next story.  It was originally a modern fantasy story with spirit shifters and magic that I started for the last NaNo I participated in.  It died at around 7k words.  I spent an hour yesterday afternoon plotting it out, working on scene and character, building the tension, making things count.

It should work.  It has all the ingredients.  But the story bores me so much that I can’t even contemplate writing it.

Have you ever had stories like that?  Stories that start out with so much promise, that sparkle in your head, but when you look at them closely, they fizzle to nothing?

I’m trying to fix it but my mind just keeps skittering away.  I have a nasty feeling that it’s the subject matter; magic and shapeshifters with a hint of romance.  Okay, yuck.  It IS the subject matter.  But why did I even dream it up if I don’t like those sort of stories?  I like grit, I must have grit and meaning, and consequences and, lets be honest, a little blood and death.  Could I turn that story into grit and blood and death?  Don’t know.  Putting it down to stew for a while, and see what my brain comes up with.

Not a stellar week, by any means.  How was yours?

A bit of alphabetic fun

Anna over at Quills and Zebras posted another challenge.

The rules are this: write a story that is 26 sentences long. This first sentence must start with the letter ‘A’, and every following sentence begins with the subsequent letter of the alphabet, ending with ‘Z’.

It’s a cute challenge, but there are some letters that are just a bit too difficult to work around.  So I cheated, and went for 26 lines of dialogue instead.  Enjoy!

**Update!  Janette and Chris have joined in, and produced two great SF shorts.  Post a link in the comments here or on Anna’s page if you are going to play .

———————————

“All staff initiate emergency procedures.  Exhaust containment failure.

“Bloody hell!  How close is the station?”

“Collision warning.  Collision warning.”

“Decelerate!”

“Engines non-responsive.”

“Fuck.”

“Get down to the engine room, clear those lines!”

“How?  The blast doors are locked down!”

“Impact in T-minus 10 seconds.”

“Just do it!”

“Karma’s biting back, boys!  Should have left that last freighter alone!”

“Look to your stations, and cut the malarky!”

“My boards are offline.  We’re losing power.”

“Nine.”

“Open the port bay and dump the cargo!”

“Port cargo bay dumped.  If this ships a-rockin’, baby, don’t come a-knockin’!”

“Quiet down!  Where’s that power reroute?”

“Rerouting now.  Boards should be coming back up!”

“Six”

“Thrusters online!  Get us out of here!”

“Unable to engage thrusters!”

“Vitals failing!  We’re losing servo control!”

“What?”

“Xenon leakage in the hydraulics!  We’ve got pressure overflow!”

“You’ve got to be kidding me.”

“Zero.”

Cranky

I had my weekend off from the net and it was mostly successful, except for an interlude where I accepted an award and posted an interview at the club.

Today I realised I have spent 12 days on a short story that has gone to pot beneath my pen.  I took the pressure off at the wrong moment, and now it is dull, dull, dull.  I am very annoyed.  It started out with the promise of fear and excitement and a nice scary ending, but now its gone to a mundane place, the sort of place where tweens in logo shirts buy Nickelback albums and pretend to be bad.

Bah.  I shall throw an artistic tantrum and storm off.

I’ve begun the type in of Rebel and Traitor.  I hate every sentence, every drivelling, snivelling action of my freakishly boring characters.  I may need more distance to be able to look at it objectively.  I’m thinking sometime next August might be good.

So with the current short story a complete wash out, I’m going to wrestle the next idea into submission in preparation for writing.

This time, I will pay more attention to tension, and not let the steam out until the right moment.  I hope.

Turning off the net

I know I haven’t been saying much, but my net usage over the past week has been phenomenal, mostly due to the amazing experience that has been MCM’s 3D1D writing of Typhoon.  It’s almost done now though, and while I am on the edge of my seat, waiting to find out if Yuri lives, if Rook and Kani sort it out, if Kani manages to rescue Stacey, well, I’ll also be glad when it’s over, because I am really getting behind on my responsibilities.

So, once I’ve done some tidying and posted a few interview questions to people, I’m going to turn off the net.  Friday night until Monday morning.  It will do me good.

And in that time, I can finish the beta on my crit partner’s novel, write more than 300 words and day and hopefully remember what the sun looks like.

See you on the other side!

Juror Number 8

Tonight Fox Classics played the original 12 Angry Men, starring Henry Fonda and a lot of Hollywood greats that I have never heard of.  I’ve seen this story before on the stage in Brisbane a couple of years ago, but it was nice to see the movie.

If you write, and you haven’t seen this movie, then add it to your reference list of must-see works. Especially if you write short stories, but really if you write anything.

Twelve Angry men was originally penned in 1954 by Reginald Rose (the link takes you to his Wiki page) and is still relevant today.  Not just because of the subject matter, but because of the execution.  It’s the execution that makes this work a must-study for the writer.

Rose manages, in just one scene (three in the movie, but two were tacked on) to tell a story entirely through movement and dialogue.  There is no description.  The setting is stark, with minimal props.  (In the play, a table and chairs, a knife and a diagram were the only things onstage with the actors.)   The clarity Rose achieves in this work, by stripping away everything inconsequential from the story, is breathtaking.

Nothing is told to the viewer.  The scene is an exercise in showing, and one created by a master storyteller.  I defy you to watch this story and not be consumed completely by the struggles of these men.  And yet we, the viewer, are told so little about them.  We don’t even know their names.

The pacing is excellent; tension built slowly, wound tight as a drum, and never relaxed until the final moment.  Yet there is no action, no physical danger; there’s just 12 men alone in a room, talking.

This entire work is a study in conflict, of inner motives and character interaction.  It is perfection.  And I don’t say that lightly.  It is one of the greatest influences on my writing.  Every time I write, I try to achieve that brutal clarity of prose.

I don’t often succeed, but I keep trying.

Interpreting criticism

As a follow up to my post on ego vs criticsm, I’d like to do a post on how to read critical comments to get the most out of them.  I have plenty of examples of my own, but I would also love to have some examples from other people.

It can be the best you’ve received, the worst, complete praise, or something you found totally incomprehensible.  The more difficult to interpret, the better!

If you’d like to participate, leave some examples of criticism you have received in the comments trail.  Please remove any names to protect the innocent.  I’ll turn on anonymous commenting if that makes you feel better.

The Yin-Yang of writing

This post is about criticism and ego, two forces in the life of a writer.  Both forces are essential to your writing health, but they are opposing forces, and keeping them in balance can be tricky.  It’s writing yin-yang.

Most people would assume the light side is ego, and the dark side is critique.  After all, criticism is bad, right?

Not at all.  For the writer, criticism, whether from the self or from a reader, is a valuable tool.  Even if it appears to be pointless or ill-informed, it provides you with another viewpoint on your story.

Because let’s face it, as writers, we can be blind to the faults of our creations.  There’s that post-creation buzz, where you think the story you’ve written is the best thing since Lord of the Rings (or your favourite book of choice). That’s the ego talking, and that is the dark force, the destroyer of reason, the concealer of truth.  The ego is our child, and it’s favourite word is NO!

When the ego rules, you don’t grow, or learn.  Your child wants to stay a child forever.  The ego doesn’t understand or accept criticism, and is forever writing cliched pap, because it’s safe.  The ego will lash out at criticism with personal attacks.  You don’t know what you’re talking about.  You just don’t ‘get’ it.  You don’t understand the way I write.

We all know writers like that.  The ones with 9 finished novels, bemoaning the fact that ‘no-one gets published these days’.  What they mean is, ‘no-one is publishing ME.’

Pushing back the ego is a conscious act, and can be a struggle, especially for those of us who think we are hot shit.  I am as guilty of that as the next writer, but thankfully there are intelligent, informed writers in my circle who are happy to burst my bubble when it needs bursting.  Not everyone has access to those invaluable writing companions.  The single greatest threat to a writer is constant, undeserved praise.  If the ego takes over completely, you’re done.

But when you do push back the ego, and listen to the criticism, you learn so much.  It’s like a tide of insight washing over you, and that can be just as fulfilling, even more fulfilling, than praise.  Yes, even the criticism that, on first view, looks like it was composed by a writer who can barely string two sentences together.  Not everyone is a skilled writer, but anyone can be a reader.

I’m not going to expand on that point, because it has been very well covered by Patty Jansen’s post Please don’t tell me it’s wonderful.  Click over right now and read it.  But please do come back, because I have a little more to say.

I’ve been denigrating the ego throughout this post, but now let me point out how it is useful.  The ego, the child, is intimately tied to our creativity.  If the ego is bruised or hurt, our creativity suffers and we retreat to a place of safety; the cliche, the old tropes, the boring, safe stories that challenge no-one.  The ego needs to be fed to a certain extent, or we do not have the courage to spread our wings and travel to those strange places, to test our strength on new ideas, unusual angles, concepts alien to our own world views.

How to balance the two?  Well, let’s be honest, the ego needs less work that the critical side.  The ego is easily salved with just a little praise.  Great story.  I really enjoyed that.  Terrific writing! There you go, the ego is out of hand already.

Seeking out criticism is hard, and learning to self-critique harder.  These need to be worked on constantly.  Find a good writing group, invite critical thinkers into your writing village.  Put your work out there, and accept the barbs and stings that come your way.  Look at your stories honestly.  Love them unconditionally for a time, then pick them up again and see them for what they are, warts and all.

Like Patty says; please don’t tell me it’s wonderful.  By all means, tell me if you liked it, but don’t be shy of pointing out where it didn’t work for you.  That comment, for me, is worth more than any praise in terms of my growth as a writer.

Turns out it was just pus

Remember how I was comparing the post-novel headspin to tinitis?

Well, it wasn’t anything to do with finishing the WIP, or at least not completely.  I ended up with an ear infection.

I won’t go into details in case you are eating.

A doctor’s visit and $80 later, aside from the stabbing headpain and the leaking ear, things are back to normal.

Writing like a maniac, and loving it.

How about you?

Could be post-novel blues, could be tinitis…

My head is still buzzing, and it will not stop.  I’m trying to concentrate on the next story, but there’s this ringing in my ears that drowns everything out.

One downside of finishing is that I feel constantly that I should be writing.  I’m all unbalanced.  My routine is shot, and I am a creature of routine.  I use routine as a time management tool, invaluable when you work at home with a child.  Otherwise nothing gets done.  And now I feel that nothing is getting done!

Why didn’t you guys tell me about this?

I suppose this is why a lot of people work on concurrent projects; they’re never in the post-project moment.  Something to think about for next time; start another piece before I finish the current one.

Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

I’m rambling, I know.  There are words inside, tumbling around my head like clothes in a dryer.  I’m afraid if I open the door and start writing, they’ll all tumble out in a heap.  Hence the blog post, where rambling is, if not advisable, at least not disastrous.

Novel Push Initiative Update: The End!

Put down the pens, lift your fingers off the keyboard, you made it.  For the past 22 days, you wrote everyday, no matter what.

It wasn’t easy, was it?

In the end, it’s not the number of words; it’s being in the writing space for long enough to start writing.  Let’s be honest, with work and family and internet and other distractions, it’s not easy.  Commitments need to be juggled to find time for you to write.  And when it’s been a long day, and the baby has been unsettled, and you’re tired, or sick, or you’ve been wrestling with utility providers on the phone, writing is the easiest thing to drop off the to-do list.

So you can be damn proud of yourselves for making the commitment and following through, right to the end.  And for those who love badges:

Display with pride, if you so desire.

Now, the stats!

Days writing: 22

Completed works: 3

Knockouts: 6

Skin of my teeth award: Little Scribbler, day 16, 252 words and Quillsandzebras, day 15, 253 words

Write like a demon award: Jedlight, day 15, 2902 words

Total words written by all participants: 167,287 words!

On to the individual summaries.  There was a bit of confusion about whether Friday or Saturday was the final day, my fault.  So no penalty for those people who finished on Friday!

Jedlight (Aline)

Day	Date	Words	Progress
15	19/09/2009	2902	Tougher Than Nano
16	20/09/2009	1600	Session
17	21/09/2009	1244	Session
18	22/09/2009	582	Update
19	23/09/2009	695	Update
20	24/09/2009	1380	Session
21	25/09/2009	608	Update
22	26/09/2009	783	Update
	Min words:	582
	Max words:	2902
	Average:	1224
	Total:	9794
	First Week:	2640
	Second Week:	2741
	Third Week:	9794
	TOTAL WORDS:	15175

Francesca

Day	Date	Words	Progress
15	19/09/2009	823	Update
16	20/09/2009	310	Update
17	21/09/2009	1780	Tougher Than Nano
18	22/09/2009	287	Update
19	23/09/2009	2282	Tougher Than Nano
20	24/09/2009	1927	Tougher Than Nano
21	25/09/2009	1467	Session
22	26/09/2009	1321	Session
	Min words:	287
	Max words:	2282
	Average:	1275
	Total:	10197
	First Week:	3679
	Second Week:	12811
	Third Week:	10197
	TOTAL WORDS:	26687

Graham

Day	Date	Words	Progress
15	19/09/2009	650	Update
16	20/09/2009	650	Update
17	21/09/2009	600	Update
18	22/09/2009	600	Update
19	23/09/2009	950	Update
20	24/09/2009	600	Update
21	25/09/2009	350	Update
	Min words:	350
	Max words:	950
	Average:	629
	Total:	4400
	First Week:	6350
	Second Week:	3900
	Third Week:	4400
	TOTAL WORDS:	14650

Selestial (Julie)

Day	Date	Words	Progress
15	19/09/2009	326	Update
16	20/09/2009	1861	Tougher Than Nano
17	21/09/2009	1952	Tougher Than Nano
18	22/09/2009	2155	Tougher Than Nano
19	23/09/2009	2427	Tougher Than Nano
20	24/09/2009	1502	Session
21	25/09/2009	1375	Session
22	26/09/2009	1014	Session
	Min words:	326
	Max words:	2427
	Average:	1577
	Total:	12612
	First Week:	5537
	Second Week:	6981
	Third Week:	12612
	TOTAL WORDS:	25130

Kait

Day	Date	Words	Progress
15	19/09/2009	321	Update
16	20/09/2009	279	Update
17	21/09/2009	465	Update
18	22/09/2009	530	Update
19	23/09/2009	526	Update
20	24/09/2009	539	Update
21	25/09/2009	280	Update
22	26/09/2009	257	Update
	Min words:	257
	Max words:	539
	Average:	400
	Total:	3197
	First Week:	5417
	Second Week:	5132
	Third Week:	3197
	TOTAL WORDS:	13746

Littlescribbler

Day	Date	Words	Progress
15	19/09/2009	254	Update
16	20/09/2009	252	Update
17	21/09/2009	469	Update
18	22/09/2009	1722	Tougher Than Nano
19	23/09/2009	254	Update
20	24/09/2009	252	Update
21	25/09/2009	281	Update
	Min words:	252
	Max words:	1722
	Average:	498
	Total:	3484
	First Week:	3205
	Second Week:	2173
	Third Week:	3484
	TOTAL WORDS:	8862

Merrilee

Day	Date	Words	Progress
15	19/09/2009	1200	Session
16	20/09/2009	1000	Session
17	21/09/2009	1300	Session
18	22/09/2009	1200	Session
19	23/09/2009	Day of reprieve
20	24/09/2009	1200	Session
21	25/09/2009	1000	Session
22	26/09/2009	1000	Session
	Min words:	1000
	Max words:	1300
	Average:	1129
	Total:	7900
	First Week:	9800
	Second Week:	8350
	Third Week:	7900
	TOTAL WORDS:	26050

Quillsandzebras (Anna)

Day	Date	Words	Progress
15	19/09/2009	253	Update
16	20/09/2009	575	Update
17	21/09/2009	463	Update
18	22/09/2009	573	Update
19	23/09/2009	1116	Session
20	24/09/2009	571	Update
21	25/09/2009	601	Update
22	26/09/2009	2025	Tougher Than Nano
	Min words:	253
	Max words:	2025
	Average:	772
	Total:	6177
	First Week:	3036
	Second Week:	3936
	Third Week:	6177
	TOTAL WORDS:	13149

Once again, well done everyone!